Morning time

My beloved starts his new job today and we're really gonna see how car sharing with two addresses really works now. Things are about to get alot more interesting!

Today, he had to be at his job at 9am and so did I. I live in Fort Worth. He is in Arlington. I work in Arlington, and he works in Fort Worth. How convenient.

We pretty much make a big circle. I leave the house by 7:15. I pick him up. He drops me off. He drives to his work. He gets off two hours before me, so that should not be a hard part of the day. If there were no traffic, the whole trip might only take an hour. But obviously, that's only a dream that there would never be traffic.

Life will get easier once we're married for so many logistics reasons and probably harder in others.

I think one thing I'm learning in this process is a new level of teamwork. I was on my own for so long, and made all my own decisions always. I didn't consult anyone on anything unless I chose to. If I made a mistake, I dealt with it on my own.

At first, I thought I would only involve him in what I wanted to and continue to control what I thought was working already for me. Adding another person changes everything! Nothing that works for you as a single works for you as a couple.

I have to let him be a real part of the team.

We learned really quickly that we couldn't just mix our finances a little. Holy sweet Jesus! Disaster!

But we're learning. I'm learning that I have to trust him to put us ahead of himself, and that I might be the one that has the most trouble thinking of us first. I find myself wanting to be selfish and even sneaky about purchases, and justifying my actions to myself. Then I get convicted about it and confess and he doesn't care. He has no desire to control me. I find myself going the "ask forgiveness instead of permission" route.

I'm learning teamwork and submission and humility from this marriage thing. It's not about me. Car sharing is best for us right now. I can't just pull the "It's my car. I make the payments." card every time I want my way. I have... but I'm learning.

I'm kind of a mess. I do not like to get up early. I will cut you if you make me get up early. (I'm gonna love parenting, right?) If you want to party until late at night, I'm your girl! But on this, I know it's important to be flexible.

I'm learning and I'm growing.